January 15th, 2017

Kinsky, California, USA

Phase Change, II

Aaron groggily opened his eyes. He could feel the weight of the bed shift under him – the person next to him was getting up.

He reached out and felt the smoothness of Rose’s forearm as she ascended from where she laid. But she didn’t stop for him, instead getting up and walking out the room.

Aaron could guess in his gut that something was wrong. In fact, something had been different about Rose for weeks now. He got up from the bed and in the corner of his vision saw Rose standing in the bathroom, looking down into the sink, her toothbrush in her hand. Her face in the golden light of the dimming bathroom bulb seemed worried, concerned, deep in thought.

“Hey… everything alright?” the boy asked. 

Rose quickly turned towards him. She gave him a smile, but it was clear she was forcing it.

“Yeah, everything’s fine.”

Aaron got up from the bed. “You sure?”

Rose didn’t respond. Aaron stepped into the bathroom – Bonny was there in the corner, wagging her tail, sitting patiently looking up at Rose.

The girl, who was in the middle of brushing her teeth when Aaron asked for confirmation, spit out her toothpaste then looked up at the mirror.

“Listen, I know you can keep a secret. That’s why I’m going to tell you, alright?”

Aaron nodded. “My lips are sealed. Always and forever.”

Rose took some time to gather her thoughts. Then she turned towards him, looking Aaron in the eyes.

“Cole was a pedophile.”

The sentence hit Aaron so hard he wasn’t sure how to respond. He stepped back, and stuttered.

“What- he- what do you-”

“Anita,” Rose elaborated. “He said he had a… ‘relationship’ with Anita. He told Maria about it the night before his suicide.”

“Well… what did… I mean, what did he mean by ‘relationship’?”

“You know what it means, Aaron!” Rose’s tone was as exasperated as it could be, given how awake she currently was. And while the boy was still skeptical – he felt he knew Cole well, much more well than Rose ever had – he kept to himself. The two were silent, getting ready for the day in the same sink basin, while Bonny watched them cautiously from below.

…

Later that day Aaron met with Maurice, Russell, and Rodrigo at Koko’s. The tone among them was still dour, as the boys in particular had a hard time adjusting to their best friend’s death. Even their once all-empowering appetite seemed to be affected, as they settled for smaller boxes this time around.

“You guys gonna play Resonance of Aria when it comes out next weekend?” Rodrigo brought up, trying to lighten the mood.

Russell shook his head. “I don’t own a Playstation. Maybe I’ll check it out over at Isaac’s place, though.”

“What about you, Aaron?”

Aaron looked down at his food. He had barely eaten – highly uncharacteristic of him – instead just dipping the same fry around in a spurt of ketchup on the side of his tray.

“Somethin’ wrong?” Maurice asked when Aaron didn’t answer the question. 

“Oh, nothing. It’s just… something Rose said, is all.”

“Don’t tell me that girl is thinking of breaking up with you!” Rodrigo called out, a little bit too loud. “I put a lot of my reputation on the line for you two. I hope she knows that.”

Aaron shook his head emphatically, though his face was still dour. “No, nothing like that. Just something she told me. It’s unrelated to our relationship.”

“What’d she say?” Rodrigo further interrogated, unable to help himself.

Aaron did, for a few moments, think about what Rose had told him. That what she said had to stay perfectly private between them. But at the same time, the words had been such a shock to him – still much left unsaid – and in a way that he wasn’t sure he could talk to her about it any more than he already had. 

“Well… I know you guys can keep a secret, right?” Aaron asked the group.

The three on the other side of the table all looked at each other. Rodrigo also swept his eyes across the rest of the restaurant – there were only a few others in the restaurant at this hour, and none of them appeared to be those who would be interested in their personal drama.

“Of course,” Maurice spoke up first. “What’s up, man? We got your back.”

Aaron leaned in. He spoke in hushed tones.

“Rose was telling me… the girls, Maria… they had found out that Cole was a pedophile. That he killed himself before anyone could say anything.”

“What?!” Rodrigo suddenly shouted in exasperation. “What are they-”

“Rod, pipe down!” Russell said in a frenetic whisper.

“S-sorry,” Rodrigo recomposed himself, and asked again, this time in a quiet, stifled voice. “What are they thinking? What, they think what happened to Anita is Cole’s fault?”

“She didn’t get into it,” Aaron continued. “I don’t think she wanted to. All she said was that Cole had a conversation with Maria the night before he died that made her realize what happened to Anita was Cole’s fault.”

Maurice, too, looked skeptical. “What exactly did he say? Did she tell you?”

Aaron slumped into his seat and shook his head. “No specifics. She got defensive when I pushed her — and one thing I’ve learned is never to push Rose when she gets defensive.”

“Something’s not right about this,” Rodrigo murmured. “I’m sure they’re just… flustered, with everything that’s been going on. But calling out one of our closest friends like that really is a dirt move.”

Russell, the only one among the four to stay quiet on the topic, looked down at his food and pretended to be busy eating. Rodrigo didn’t fall for it.

“Rus, what do you think about all this?” the latino boy asked him.

Russell shook his head. “I ain’t thinking of anything. Right now, all we got is someone saying shit. There could be something to it, there could not be. We don’t know.”

Rodrigo sighed. “You always have both the wisest and most uninteresting takes.”

Russell shrugged, looking at Rodrigo next to him through the side-slit of his sunglasses. “That’s the truth for you.”

…

In the same thrift store that Kat had bought Maria’s prom dress all those months before, Emily and Ash now wandered around its low-walled racks of women’s clothing, skimming the lines and occasionally stopping to observe something that caught their eye.

“You think this would look good?” Emily called out, taking a red blouse off the rack and showing it off to Ash. “I could fit it with those stained jeans I got. After I got rid of the white one.”

Ash observed the fit, scratching the top of her head. “Yeah, it could work. I don’t think you should fit it with the stained jeans, though.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah. Maybe the darker ones instead. I dunno, I’d have to see the combinations on you.”

Emily looked back at the blouse, her face concerned. “But should I buy the blouse or not…?”

Ash smiled. “Do what makes you happy.”

Emily looked back at the blouse. She gave a smirk and hooked the shirt gently under her arm, then kept looking down the rack.

“Hey, is it okay if I ask you something that’s been on my mind?” Ash called out a few moments later.

“Of course. Shoot.”

“That text you got. From Rose, two weeks ago.”

Even though it had been awhile, Emily immediately knew what Ash was talking about. She got nervous.

“What about it?”

“Was there really… nothing to it?”

“What do you mean?” Emily kept up the act.

“I just remember… At the time, you said Maria needed help, and that she texted the two of you because you live the closest to her. But that’s not true. I live the closest to her,” Ash looked back at the rack. “Not just that, though. I remember you guys were AWOL the whole night. And the next week after the two of you acted really weird. Same with Rose and Maria.”

Emily had been worried about this. Ash was always the most perceptive of all the girls, and it was guaranteed she’d eventually figure out that something was up. Knowing she was cornered, Emily sighed.

“Listen. I’m gonna tell you this because I know you can keep a secret.” 

Emily turned her head up and surveyed the others around them. She beckoned Ash to come closer, and the girl did.

“Apparently something messed up happened with Cole, right before he died.”

Ash didn’t follow. “Like…?”

“Well, Maria told everyone… she told Rose, me, Sadja… that Cole was the one who sexually abused Anita, before she died.”

Ash, unsure how to react, opened her mouth in a silent Oh, reeling in the muted shock of hearing such a horrible rumor in such an innocuous place.

“We have plans to let Kat know tonight, but we’re clueless on how to handle it and really I’ve been freaking out about the whole thing.”

Emily’s blue-haired friend was quiet, not responding immediately. Her fingers rubbed against the shoulder of a tweed coat on one of the racks. She seemed spaced out. Eventually, though, she came to.

“Just tell her the truth. Kat is a reasonable person. She might not immediately believe it, but she won’t fight or yell at you.”

Emily nodded. “It will be mostly Maria, anyway. But I think that’s a good way to think about it. Thanks…” She seemed to trail off, as if she was going to say more, but just looked back at the rack. It was only after a few minutes more of scouting out clothes that she spoke up again.

“…I’m glad I ended up telling you, by the way.”

Ash turned her head. She smiled. But part of her still wondered why she wasn’t in on it in the first place. Deep inside, she felt she knew the reason.

…

Late that night, the girls met at Maria’s place. All of them were there now but Kat – Ash ended up coming along after an invite from Emily, and the other girls didn’t mind that she was now involved. They sat, crowded around her dinner table. Sadja looked down at her phone, the glow of the screen reflecting onto her face.

“She says she’ll be here in a few,” Sadja said, a tinge of anxiety in her voice. Rose, who had her chair propped against the window, looked through the shades to see the vantage point at the front of the house. 

Ash twiddled her thumbs. The advice she had given Emily before she now questioned. Her nerves were getting the better of her, and she could feel it. She did a breathing practice she read about online a few days prior, but it didn’t seem to help.

A few minutes later, Rose broke through the icy silence of the room to let the rest know that Kat’s red pickup was pulling up to the driveway. Those who were standing sat back at the table, as Rose moved to open the door for her.

When Kat came in, there was a confused look on her face when she saw everyone sitting at the table. She took a step back, unsure what was making the energy in the room feel so off.

“Hey… what’s wrong?” she asked meekly to her five closest friends. 

“Sorry, we didn’t want to freak you out. Just sit down, okay?” Rose mentioned with some sympathy. Kat, unsure what else to do, sat at the last empty seat at the table. Rose, who was still standing, turned her head over to Maria.

Maria took a deep breath. “There’s something about Cole’s death I didn’t tell you about. I don’t know why I’ve hid it from you for so long, and I feel ashamed that I have. But I feel like now is as good of a time to tell you as I’ll ever get.”

Kat felt her heart sink. She looked over at the others and could tell she was the only person in the room who was still out of the loop. She turned back to Maria but said nothing.

Maria continued.

“Back last semester, Cole and I were looking into anyone who could’ve… hurt Anita. As I got deeper into it I realized that there were several things Cole told me that weren’t adding up. For example, he told me that he wasn’t the last person to babysit Anita, even though he was. He told me that he’d always text me when Anita went to sleep, but I found out that wasn’t true either. And as I realized other people were innocent, I began to realize, that… maybe Cole…”

Feeling herself begin to tear up, she took a pause. The entire time she told this story she was looking down at the dark oak of the table. She didn’t dare to meet Kat in her eyes.

“I confronted him about it. On New Year’s Eve. He broke down and… he told me everything. That he and Anita had what he called a ‘deep’ relationship. I knew what it all meant. But I didn’t think he would end up doing what he did.”

Maria finally looked up, but she instead looked towards Rose. She saw Rose eyeing down Kat like a hawk, and it gave her the confidence to look towards Kat as well.

Her face was hollow. There was nothing there – no sadness, no anger, nothing. It was rare for such an expressive girl like Kat, but all this was unprecedented. 

“Okay,” Kat finally uttered after what felt like an agonizingly long silence. “I believe you.”

That was it. The group waited in silence to see if she would say anything else – any elaboration, any concern, anything. But she just continued to sit there, staring. And with the air as thick as it was, no one dared say anything.

“Do you, Kat?” Rose spoke out, braving the silence. “If you have any hesitations, now’s the time to let them out.”

Kat took a deep breath in. She looked around at the dimly lit house, away from the others’ gazes. “I knew Cole. I’d like to think I knew him really well. And I’m still processing that he’s gone. That I’m never going to see him again,” she suddenly shot her head away from the others, as her eyes began to blink away tears. “To be completely honest with you, the Cole I know would never do this. But I’ve already found out there’s a lot I don’t know. About everything.”

Sympathy began to melt over Rose’s face, and she walked over to comfort her friend. Maria nodded her head in acknowledgement.

“I know how you feel. It’s why I don’t want to jump into telling the world about it. I got close to Cole too,” Maria answered. “I’m not telling you this because of some theory. I wouldn’t dare mention it unless I was sure it was true. Maybe that’s the reason it took me so long to tell you in the first place.”

Kat made eye contact with her. To Maria, it seemed like she understood now. The past was a lie and the present was irrevocably changed.

“I have a question, if that’s okay…” Sadja spoke out meekly to the girls around the table. “We still need to tell the guys about this, yeah?”

Rose turned towards her, but didn’t betray what she had told Aaron. “We should just tell them privately. If Maria doesn’t want to make this a big deal, the best way is probably to get them each individually, around the same time. Saves us from having rumors spread around.”

“And Lukas?”

The air turned cold. Rose and Maria turned back towards Kat, who now was standing up and had her back turned away from them towards one of the outside windows.

“We should be careful,” she answered. “I don’t think he’ll take it well. I can try to think of something, but I think I’ll need all your help.”

Emily gave an empathetic smile. “Of course.”

“We’re with you. Always,” Sadja seconded.

Maria didn’t say anything, but she got up and walked over to Kat and Rose, wrapping her arms around each of them. “Hey, you guys are all here now, yeah?” she finally said, with a now uncharacteristically bright face. “Let’s do something. Mama and I bought a new board game from the store. It’s sort of like charades, but – here, let me show you!”

With that, she yanked on the arms of the two girls she was next to and pulled them into the living room, beckoning the others to come as well. The mood had changed once again, this time for the better. Things were good. For now.